19 October 2006

Mustard Seeds

September of last year I had a cyst removed from my right ovary – it was a painful recovery as my doc opted to forgo the laser and went with the traditional incision instead. “Better chance of saving your ovary,” she’d said, which, since I’d been battling infertility, sounded like the best course of action to me. Two egg-producing o’s had to be better than one, right?

Two weeks ago I went in for a sonogram to see how everything was looking. The technician kept measuring and remeasuring one large spot and since everything on a sono looks the same to me, I assumed it was my uterus. It wasn’t. It was a cyst.

I have another “friend.”

I panicked of course (hello, thought we were done with this!) and the doctor reassured me that everything would be OK. Now, however, I’m having pain — intense, excruciating, leg-numbing pain. I called the doc. She said the cyst was probably trying to rupture, but it was nothing to worry about (apparently only patients get freaked out by words like “rupture,” lol). I’m having another sono in the morning to see what’s going on in there.

But here’s the real point of my ramblings, an e-mail I just received from my mom: “I hope you are not hurting as much now — I’ve been praying for you all night. God said all it takes is a mustard seed of faith. Well, if that is true then you may have about a billion children!!! =) You are going to be the most awesome/eclectic mommy there has ever been — stay true to yourself! Be safe in God's Amazing Grace.

How can I worry when my mom is planting so many mustard seeds on my behalf? And how can I be anxious when there are so many wonderful strangers — readers — who have been following my journey and sending me their hope, faith and encouragement?

Tonight I’m planting my own mustard seeds of faith — for my mom — for you — for all of us. May these seeds bloom and grow into the beautiful miracles they are destined to be.

much love~

1 comment:

Lindsay said...

Oh Tessa... I am praying for you right now!
Take care